John Boston | 2022: Media’s First Bona Fide Year in Review

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We live in mad, whirlwind times, where constant impatience drives us to get things from cheeseburgers to test results faster than the thought of snapping fingers. It’s 2022. Almost. Instant soup and blinking takes too long. 

In keeping with this molar-grinding custom of Accelerated Expectations, we proudly present America’s very first journalistic retrospect: Santa Clarita 2022 — The Year in Review. Here now — a look back at 2022’s headlines. 

COVID 22: THE FLATULENCE FLU — Controversial Dr. Anthony Fauci was fired today as America’s top health official, immediately springboarding to the powerful City Flatulence Czar. Fauci immediately issued a fatwah, calling upon all SCVians to celebrate New Year’s by 1:45 this afternoon, alone. The Ayatollah Fauci warned that the new, virulent strain of COVID-22, called Low-Flying Ducks Chimney Flue, attacks chimneys…

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